Home Film
Film: Nicolas Cage Is Going To Die
Your Ad Here
nicolas cage


04/17/10 - I guess Nicolas Cage has given up on life. Looks life he's planning on dying soon and has purchased a tomb for himself in New Orleans. I can see where he's coming from though. I currently owe the IRS $7,000,000 and that's only half of what he owes. I'm not going to kill myself until 2012 though. I wanna do it when all the asteroids start smashing into the earth. Sort of like Woody Harrelson did in Yellowstone.


Click here for the direct link to this post.

| More
 
Film: Mel Gibson Loves Jesus!
Your Ad Here
mel gibson divorce


04/14/10 - Another one bites the dust: Mel Gibson (54) and his Russian-born singer girlfriend, Oksana Grigorieva (39), have apparently broken up five months after the birth of their baby daughter.

Isn’t Mel Gibson a self-proclaimed super religious dude? He’s the same guy that made The Passion Of Christ, right? Nevermind. Forget it. I guess it’s not important. What is important though is that he bangs hot model chicks who are 15 years younger than him! That's pretty fucking awesome if you ask me. He's still got nothing on my man Larry King though! Woop Woop! (Yes, that was me pumping my fist in the air and saying "Woop! Woop!" while I type a stupid celebrity blog that nobody reads... FML.)

Click here for the direct link to this post.

| More
 
Film: Another Tim Burton Remake
Your Ad Here
Tim Burton


03/21/10 - Ok, I know everyone freaking loves Tim Burton and everything he touches, but whatever. I'm sick of him remaking everything. I thought his remake of Charlie and the Chocolate Factory was ok, but it never needed to be remade in the first place. The original was awesome. Don't get me wrong, I liked Edward Scissorhands, Beetlejuice, Batman, and Batman Returns, but ever since his remake spree began with Planet of the Apes, he's been on a creative downhill spiral. I mean, come on, it's Charlton Heston. How can you mess with Charlton Heston? (I still haven't seen the remake just out of respect to the fallen master.) I've got nothing against Mark Wahlberg though. In fact, I actually like good old Marky Mark. 

Anyway, I haven't seen Alice In Wonderland yet either, but I don't really even want to. I don't get this whole '3D' revolution thing. I thought we decided to move past that back in the 80's? I appreciate what Hollywood is trying to achieve with 3D, but I still think they have a ways to go. I hate wearing those damn glasses. Maybe I'm a pussy, but by the end of a movie I usually have a pounding head ache and feel like throwing up my Milk Duds. Apparently everyone else in the world loves it though because Alice in Wonderland has now made $565.8 million. I'm not making that up. Click here if you don't believe me.

Anyway, I've ranted for long enough. The main reason I brought all this up is because he just got the green light to go forward on his next film. Guess what? That's right! You guessed it! It's another remake! Aren't you all excited! Yay! Apparently he now wants to take another classic, The Addams Family, and sprinkle his "Burton Dust" all over that as well. What the hell is his problem? Has he completely ran out of original ideas at this point? I mean, this is getting ridiculous. 

Also, if he's going to keep making remakes, can't he at least take crappy old films and then make them better? Why does he keep trying to one-up the classics? I don't get why people let him do it. If some painter came along and was like, "Hey, let me touch up the Mona Lisa. I wanna add some goblins in the background.", everyone would tell him to F-off, but somehow it's cool if Tim Burton does it to classic movies? Whatever, I guess I don't really give a shit. Burton can do whatever he wants. He's made more money in a weekend then I'll probably make in my whole damn life, so who the hell am I to criticize the guy? Besides, I guess I can't really talk anymore crap until I actually go see Alice In Wonderand for myself. Who knows, maybe I'll actually like it. I just hope he finally lets Johnny Depp branch off on his own after this. I miss him in roles like Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas and Blow. I can't believe his wife made him quit that new movie with Angelina Jolie. What a bioch.

 

| More
 
Film: Charlie Sheen Unemployed?
Your Ad Here
Charlie Sheen


04/01/10 - Charlie Sheen reportedly wants to quit Two and a Half Men. Whatever, I don't blame him. Didn't he just get out of rehab? If I had just wasted a bunch of time in rehab, I'd want to take some time off to do drugs and bang hot chicks too, wouldn't you?

| More
 
Film: Who Wants To Buy MGM?
Your Ad Here
MGM Bankrupt


04/01/10 - Who wants to buy MGM Studios? Apparently, they are selling themselves (yes, on a street corner). The CEO is currently offering "handsies" for $10 and "mouthies" for $20. That's honestly a really good r ate. Not that I would know. It just seems like a really good rate. 

| More
 
Film: Sequel To Planet Earth?

 

Your Ad Here
Discovery Channel Life


04/01/10 - So we all know that Planet Earth is one of the best nature documentaries ever. The Discovery Channel also knows this and figured that if they made some sort of sequel they could make a crap ton more money. Makes since to me. They are calling it Life.

They decided to have Oprah narrate it. I have nothing against Oprah, but apparently Discovery is already having some issues with her. I guess she threw a temper tantrum during an interview with the bats because they just flew around and wouldn't answer any of her questions. I sort of see where she's coming from though. That would be totally annoying.

| More
 
Film: Corey Haim Drug Ring?
Your Ad Here
Corey Haim


03/17/10 - Apparently there is some sort of drug ring associated with the death of actor Corey Haim and it involves a bunch of doctors. Really guys? Really? You're a respected doctor that probably makes over half a million a year and your risking your job and a prison sentence so that you can tell people you write prescriptions for Corey Haim at cocktail parties? WTF?

 

| More
 
<< Start < Prev 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 Next > End >>

Page 17 of 17

Maine Home Shirt

the home shirt

Do you love Maine? Prove it.